No woman can deny that motherhood is a deeply life changing experience. I held my baby for the first time and suddenly my life had so much more meaning. It was no longer just about me and my journey through life but the life of this precious little person I held in my arms. I felt a fierce desire to protect my baby; to keep him safe for always and give him everything he needs to fulfil his Divine purpose and live a happy, healthy, abundant life. I was ready to rise to the challenge of motherhood, to enjoy the precious times that were to come and most importantly to ‘get it right’. But how do you get it right?
There are many so called experts telling you how you should be raising your child, down to the tiniest detail, but in my opinion the only expert is you. You are the expert of your child and inside of you are all the answers, guidance and support you will ever need. How does that statement make you feel? Empowered? Scared? Do you really believe that you are the real expert of your child? Unfortunately many do not.
We live in an age where we have an abundance of information available to us and even though much of it is valuable and can enhance our life, the downside is that it can take us away from what we really feel and know to be true. Books and online sources offer a huge amount of information and advice on how to raise your child; the things you should do and the things you shouldn’t do but with so much conflicting advice, who should you listen to? Well, it makes sense to listen to the person who knows your child best…and that is you!
It’s not that books and other forms of guidance do not have a place, some of the information can be beneficial, but the danger is that if we believe everything we read and follow advice blindly from somebody who doesn’t know our child then doesn’t this mean that we are not taking into account the individuality of our child?
As a therapist, I have seen hundreds of clients and I can honestly say that I have treated no two clients the same. The reason? Because we are individuals with individual needs. Even if two clients present the exact same problem to me, the treatment they receive will differ because for it to be effective it must be tailored to their specific needs. No two children are the same, no two mothers are the same and your relationship with your child is absolutely unique. The connection you have with your child is very special and nobody knows your children as well as you do. Isn’t that beautiful?
I believe that when we become mothers something absolutely magical happens. We awaken deep inside of ourselves a spectacular source of wisdom and Divine knowledge that can guide us through the journey of motherhood. I sense this energy in my womb; the place within me that nurtured my child and gave him life. The power I already held within me grew and developed throughout the nine months of pregnancy, just as his tiny body did before being ready to enter this world. Motherhood is a powerful rite of passage that cannot be denied.
The problem is that so many mothers are unaware of this power they hold within. Or perhaps they feel it, but don’t trust it. We’ve all heard of the term ‘mother’s intuition’ but I think most of us underestimate exactly how powerful this really is. I’m wondering how things would be different if every single mother trusted this internal knowing and followed the guidance from within regardless of what the books or the so-called parenting experts have to say. For me, being a good mother and getting things right does not mean being a perfect parent who never makes a mistake. Rather it means nurturing this inner source of wisdom that I have been gifted with by trusting what it says and therefore staying in my power as a mother.
Unfortunately, as women we have given our power away. We have allowed outside influences to teach us that we are not good enough, that we do not know best and therefore we must search outside of ourselves for the answers we seek. Past conditioning has created deep insecurities; causing us to seek approval from others and to fear failure because we believe there is only one kind of success. But we can change this. We can come back to our true selves as women who are whole and complete, empowered and self-assured. As mothers we can choose to let go of judgement and competitiveness and instead encourage, support and inspire each other to be all we can be for the sake of ourselves, our children and indeed the world.
After all, empowered mothers raise empowered children who can change the world.
Here is a simple meditation to awaken and develop your inner guide:
- Find somewhere quiet and private where you are free to relax and take three deep breaths, breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth. Close your eyes if it’s safe to do so and simply focus on the rhythm of your breath as you inhale and exhale.
- Imagine a pure white light entering your body from the top of your head and allow it to flow down into every single muscle, easing away all traces of stress and tension. If you are unable to visualise this white light then simply allow yourself to feel it instead, perhaps as a soothing warm sensation.
- Become aware of your heart chakra (the energy centre in the centre of your chest) and imagine a ball of pink light here. Bring your child into your awareness and connect with the deep love you feel for them. You can think about all of the things you love about him/her, the things that make you smile and the special memories you hold. As you do this, sense the ball of pink light growing and becoming brighter.
- Next, imagine a strong beam of light expanding from this energy centre that reaches out to your child, creating a chord between the both of you. Sense how connected you feel in this moment to your child and feel the bond between you both. Spend time here until you feel that you are completely connected to him/her, almost as if you were one being.
- You are now ready to ask for guidance. If there is something you want to know, go right ahead and ask the question silently in your mind, or out loud if you wish to do so. If there is nothing specific, you could simply ask “What do I need to see?” or “What does my child need from me right now?” Allow yourself to be still and be open to receiving the guidance you seek. Be aware that the answers may not make themselves known straight away, it may take some time or come to you at a later date.
Note: If you have more than one child it’s best to practice this meditation with one child in mind at a time.
I recommend practicing this meditation at least twice a week, but it works best when practiced every day for at least ten minutes.
It’s also necessary to point out the importance of nurturing yourself. The more relaxed and in tune with yourself you are then the easier it is to remain in your power and be all you can be as a woman and a mother. I find that meditation is a wonderful way to do this and for this reason I have created several guided meditations and self-hypnosis recordings, especially for women.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
NICOLAS HASLETT is a British Holistic Therapist with a special interest in Women’s health and wellbeing. She trained in Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy after experiencing the life changing effects of these therapies herself and now she is dedicated to using her experience and wisdom to help others.
With a passion for helping other women, Nicola is the co-owner of publishing company ‘Aluna Moon Publishing’ which produces self-hypnosis and meditation apps and recordings especially for Women; helping them to relax, heal and come back to their true authentic selves.
Aside from her work in Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy, Nicola feels passionate about natural, gentle parenting and enjoys writing articles that will support, encourage and inspire parents everywhere to live more naturally and authentically.